OK, so I put my cigarette butts in my shoes, rather
than litter when out. Logic: I`d rather my feet not smell like my feet,
and Id rather my pockets not smell like my butts. One or the other, why
both?
One day amidst work I found a stuffed Killer whale,
I then proceeded to slam the hood on its tail and made it into a hood
ornament that did tricks for us as we traveled down the highway. As we
went through Lahaina (the tourism capital of Maui) We pulled up towards
a crosswalk, Two cute girls happened by as we did so, as they passed in
front of our work truck, one reached out and tugged at the Whale, I named
appropriately Willie, As she did this I proclaimed out Loud, "OH MY! She
Touched my Willie!".She then turned bright red and ran off while we had
a grand laugh.
If you may have noticed, Im a "Longhair", my philosophy
is, the more you cut it, and keep it from growing outward, it grows inward,
and when you're head fills up, it starts to come out of your ears, and
your back, and many other undesirable places. Be forewarned.
Quoted someone, adapted to suit my
taste, "If one must float ones boat, ones boat must float."
Did ya ever notice, most farms grow
various sprinkler heads as well?
Lets Get this Straight, I'm sure you know the "trolls"
currently marketed all over the whirrled, this fine planut Urth, they`re
fuzzy colored hair, round tummied, well dispositioned, and usually naked
possibly with a jewel in it`s Belly. Those are not trolls damnit, and
their imposing as such only gives the real trolls, not unlike myself,
a bad name. Those are menehune`s and Leprechaun`s, IMPOSTORS! I will not
rest, until it`s known, any self respecting troll would never even closely
resemble these creatures. How offensive!
OK, So I've noticed, Coffee Beans, Berries and Nuts,
They don't hang out together do they? Who the hell thought to mix them
up in coffee? No nuts or fruit in my coffee damnit!
Don`t Pee uphill in bare feet. Especially with open
sores.
Don't step on yer tongue, it Thucks!
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